Servant's Heart

I have lots to write about our recent mission trip to Honduras. I missed my computer BADLY and took notes in a journal so I could hopefully recall my thoughts and heart and write it here.

But tonight... the theme of our trip for my heart. A prayer. A longing. A tug on my heart that I did not know how to verbalize until this trip.

Amazing God who made the world. Every child. Every man and woman. Amazingly perfect in your eyes. You showed me the depth of what it means to Honor by allowing me to experience true honor.

And in the midst of that honor a longing deep in my heart.

Lord I pray that you take my heart and change it. Give me the heart of a servant. In my marriage, in my friendships, in every corner of my life... I want to be a reflection of a servant's heart.

I lay at your feet my attitude, my selfishness. For every time that I have only given you a fraction of me. I seek your forgiveness. To my husband, I pray that it is on his heart to grant me forgiveness. Lord, if you treated me the way I have treated him...

And I sit in reflection of today. I am thankful for the favor I am finding at work. I am thankful for the health of my children. That they know such a comfortable life that just the absence of me rocks their world. Such flattery I have never known.

And over and over rings another truth... Lord, you don't need me you WANT me. I am so thankful that you want me... even me.